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lyrics

My grandma, is so ill
My grandma
My grandma, is so ill
My grandma, is iller than yours

When I say ill, man I ain’t talking ‘bout a sickness
I’m talking ‘bout some sauerkraut and dumplings in the kitchen
Your grandma sucks when compared to mine
So when you go to her house be prepared to dine
Because she’s very polite, and yes I’d have to say so
But if you act up she’ll smash your ass like a mash potato
Which brings me to think that every time she cooks I be fiending to eat
Like damn, what is this? A cooking cat-o-strophe
I mean catastrophe pass the peas and the macaroni
What? You think that I’m joking?
My grandma’s never cheap like a pack of bologna
And when the traffic is flowing, and everybody’s distressed
My grandma’s so dope she goes slow and gives a shit less
Yeah, so go on and pass her
But don’t honk at her unless you want to get that ass hurt

My grandma, is so ill
My grandma
My grandma, is so ill
My grandma, is iller than yours

Now there ain’t no reason you should sit and bicker
‘Cause it’s the season she cooks the Christmas dinner
Mmm, I watch the damned time pass slow
And stuff my face with the ham and pineapple
But grab slow, ‘cause if you rush she’ll clutch your neck to grip
And regulate ‘cause she won’t even hesitate to get the switch
Watch out! Everybody’s pushing to eat
‘Cause the food is so good and sweet it’ll put you to sleep
I’m like dagwood, the food was that good
I went to conversate but wait, step back look
And what do I see? Everybody’s asleep
It must have been from grandma’s cooking ‘cause it wasn’t from me
So I begun to proceed to eat the flavory steak
And made a vowel that I’ll be staying awake
But I’m a liar, ‘cause as I walked through the house
I felt tired, I think I’ll take a spot on the couch

My grandma, is so ill
My grandma
My grandma, is so ill
My grandma, is iller than yours

credits

from Phone Sex II / Second Glance, released December 4, 2004

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Buck Bowen Long Beach, California

"Trying to bridge the growing gap between 'would-be' and 'has-been.'"

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